We have had a full week.
Jack has had lots of chest pains beyond the usual indigestion. I have stayed close and tried to keep things real pleasant. Oh well I have tried! <smiles>
When you are doing a double caregiving event--------you find there are things that are present that you would never expect. Both individuals need my time and attention. Jack is doing so many things that helps free me to give time and attention to my mom, but then he needs his fair share of my time, also. Balancing this isn't always easy.
For example: Jack and I love to go out to eat, and just sit and enjoy the people around us and chat about all kinds of things. Mother wants to put in her order and then eat asap. I have spoiled her, by having her meals ready, hot, cut into comfortable bite sizes, and she doesn't have to WAIT!
I am becoming more and more aware of the aging process and WAIT is not something that is comfortable for those who are older. Time is relative! When we went to lunch on Saturday, I explained that it was at the noon hour and the place would be full and busy and we would have to wait! Mother didn't enjoy our lunch out. It took too long. She doesn't like to go with us when we get the car serviced because we have to WAIT on it! <smiles> At Sam's Club she does WAIT, but I bring her samples while she waits! lol
I bought myself a birthday present---A new hp computer. Mine is 6 years old and ready to be replaced. The new one is still in the car and I am going to get someone to install and change over the things I need to take from the old computer. I feel perfectly capable of doing this, but the last two things I have put together and installed, I had so much HELP that I had to do too much over, because I was distracted! lol That is another item of the aging process that needs to be a part of caregiving........they need to feel needed and helpful.
Visiting with a lady recently I admired her home and said I was really into beautiful homes, since I was now homeless. I really am homeless. When those who need extra care are religated to a nursing facility they must really feel homeless. Most are aware that they will never return home, and therefore that "room" is all they have. Jack and I actually only have a "room" that is "sort of" ours. We don't have a lot of privacy and those in nursing facilities don't have much privacy. This situation makes me so aware of the elderly and infirm who need 24/7 care.
Peace from the country in autumn.............
2 comments:
I'm hoping Jack is doing okay with his chest pains (I'm also thinking you've called his doctor too?) take care of yourself; I would imagine the caregiver needs some time for herself too and I would imagine it is rare when you do. Glad you got a new computer!!
betty
Interesting observation about privacy in 24/7 care. I can only add that there is a thin line between privacy and isolation/loneliness.
Patrick
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